Patriots blanked by Bills 16-0


You did good, Rex. Have a snack. Have all the goddamn snacks.

The New England Patriots, after thumping the Houston Texans 27-0, were themselves the victims of being shut out by the Rex Ryan led Buffalo Bills 16-0. As the score indicates, it was an ugly, uneven game in which the Bills dominated for almost its entirety. There were flashes of hope here and there but almost all were negated by a penalty or a miscue that saw the Patriots shut out at home for the first time ever within the confines of Gillette Stadium the first home shutout loss suffered by the Patriots since 1993 (!).

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Handsome Jim solid as depleted Pats win in Arizona


In a week filled with more one point games than any other in NFL history the New England Patriots, sans Brady, sans Gronk, sans Ninkovich, sans Solder, sans Dion Lewis, and sans Vollmer went into the desert on Sunday Night Football and defeated the Arizona Cardinals. In a game most had tacitly accepted as an ‘L’ for the 2016 Patriots, the squad from New England was able to buckle down and hold on to a 23-21 victory thanks to a missed FG by Chandler Catanzaro in the waning seconds of the 4th quarter.

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Patriots draft makes me ask myself; Will I cry when Tom Brady retires?

So last Thursday the NFL draft commenced and over the next three days the 32 teams involved in the greatest sport since gladiator combat hedged their bets and made millionaires out of a select few 20-somethings to help them win a Super Bowl. To every football fan, the Draft is a like a seltzer water after being stranded in the desert. Not ideal compared to the real thing but you are so goddamn thirsty that you would drink camel piss so it doesn’t matter.

For Patriots fans this draft held one particular pick that has seemingly crawled into all of our imaginations and is promptly running them wild. With the 62nd pick in the draft the Pats select QB Jimmy Garoppolo (Jimmy G from now on) out of Eastern Illinois. With such a high pick no one could help but wonder, “Is this the guy? The heir to the throne upon which Brady has reigned for so long?”. Well, the point of this blog isn’t to speculate on that but on a tangent that thought process spawned. Am I going to cry why Tom Brady retires?

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